Life With Jesus

YAY! :)

2011-10-22T05:03:00.000-07:00

FINALLY im able to post stuff on my bloggie again :)
well, forget bout all my emo post before this.
its not exactly over but i'm getting over it.
TEEHEE

anyway, am having my trials now.
yesterday went for overnight prayer in school
with the sms CF commmitee for sls.
(so many short forms xD)
came home DEAD TIRED.
cause the day before only slept 2 hours.
then did my runs at 5.30pm just now.
AWESOME. raced against time.
burned calories!
MUAHAHAHHAHA..

now its time to get back to study mode.
left Maths, Business, and Accounts paper :/
its okay! Jia Yo!

God bless!

:) vs :(

2011-09-09T21:29:00.000-07:00

you make me soar up to the sky
stir emotions within me that i've never felt before
make me feel safe and secure
leave me wanting for more :/
*sounds wrong.. HAHA*

anyways,
how sure are you that its wrong?
you never gave me an explanation.
even worst, you tried to threaten me.
go ahead and tell if you can't keep a secret..
so much for all I did for you when you were in the
same situation last time.
i'm really disappointed with you..
cause you're closest to me.
yet, you responded in such a way.
sigh..

God, isn't there any way around this?
why don't you tell me yourself?
cause i'm not convince with the people around me.
help me to be able to hear your voice Lord.
i don't want to shut you out.
i need you.. T.T

WOOTS :)

2011-09-01T20:32:00.000-07:00

okaaay. IT WORKS!
it doesn't from my lappy at home. oh well.
anw, some updates :)

i'm down with flu and sore throat.
sexy voice. muahahaha.. *coughs* T.T
a lil headache from staying up yesterday till 4.30am
just to study.
i dont think it was that productive, but
better than nothing :/
stayed up with Suet Yan :)

have been out ALOT.
leaving for CF camp this Sunday.
and qualifying test is like next thurs!
one day after CF camp. thats why i gota study NOW.
see the urgency?? :(

above all this studying and outings,
am stuck in a dilemma.
do i say yes, and try to stick to the right path?
see if things workout and risk a heartbreak?
or do i say no, and not give it a chance altogether?
but save myself from what i see is coming.
sigh. i don't know what to do.
maybe CF camp will help clear my mind :)

anw, i'll blog again later if i have the time.
wana continue with my studies with Michael!
my Englist Lit buddy teehee
tata for now :)

heeeya :)

2011-09-01T20:31:00.000-07:00

in college working hard now.
i've know i've not been updating my bloggie.
i acctually did but somehow i can't post it.
not too sure why :(
lets see if this wooorks..

Hectic day :(

2011-08-12T03:19:00.000-07:00

everything seem to go wrong today
i don't know why.
from the hassle with the chapel keys,
right up to CF meeting..
but in the midst of chaos,
i thank God i can still give thanks :)

I thank God for helping me in my English Literature Coursework.
i'm gonna redo my essay,
but this time, i'm gonna do a better one :)

I thank God for good friends that i can always count on.
friends that are always there to layan my craziness
and love me despite of my weirdo habits :)

I thank God for being with me this whole week.
it just makes me feel all happy
when i think of how you bless me through the little things in life
THANK YOU JESUS :)

2.15am. working hard :)

2011-08-10T11:09:00.000-07:00

how long has it been since i stayed up this late to do work?
feeling fresh :) currently doing my English Literature Coursework.
Half my class has started on their essays.
i have not. GREAT =.="
am so pressured that i'm working hard to be
a good English Literature student too :D

TEEHEE :)

got a new Bible btw.
it looks AWESOME x)
i must read it from cover to cover once more.
got a gift for you too!
thanks for being an AWESOME friend :)
nvr know what i'd do in MCKL without you.

ok. lets see how long im gonna work tonight.
give more updates later. ciao :)

T.T

2011-08-08T04:31:00.000-07:00

don't let me go.
that's what I want.
:(

trauma vs thrill

2011-08-08T03:42:00.000-07:00

At 11.45pm on Saturday night, my family and I were on our way back from a meeting. only my brother was at home. I was exhausted. We drew near our home. We got off the car and was facing the gate when all of a sudden I saw a man crossing the bridge from the main road towards us. It was dark so I did not see the others. He started pointing his finger at us. Dad immediately yelled, "Eh! Apa you mau?!" My heart was beating like crazy. Something is going on. That's all I know. (According to dad and sis, there were around 6 men. 3 motorcyclist, 3 attackers)

My mum, sis and I hid behind the car. We were freaking out. Mum kept saying "what's going on?! what's going on?!" I panicked. I was so afraid they will surround us. I went behind the car and started running. really fast. I heard someone yelled "OI!!". One of them were following me. and I couldn't run very fast with the shoes i was wearing. I had my handbag with me, so i dropped it. I dropped it and kept running. The street was lonely but bright. The main road, on my left, was so dark. The doors of the houses on my right were all closed. I yelled for help but nobody came out. Then i began hearing hons.

I slowed down when i knew he wasn't chasing me anymore. My adrenaline was pumping like mad. Fear was written all over my face. I was too shocked to cry. Everything happened in a split second. i waited for awhile outside a house. Then I heard my sis and dad yelling for me. My sis was like.. "Jie Jie! quickly come back!!" I freaked out again! i thought they were chasing me =.=" I ran back (quite a distance) and sat in the car.

my sis and mum was in the car too. When they realise what was going on, they headed straight into the car. My mum kept horning like crazy to scare them off. Dad on the other hand was fighting with one of the guy. the man tried to hit my dad with a steel chain but dad manage to push him onto our other car, parked opposite our house. They got scared and quickly cabut. All the while, bro was in the house. Thank God he did not know what was going on,so he din't open the house door. they might have came in. Thank God everybody is safe too :) and they only manage to get my bag (which only contains my Bible - din bring IC that night) Thank God for His protection really. phew. What a life.

traumatic yet thrilling xD

stressed UP!

2011-07-30T21:35:00.000-07:00

yikes. i needa break.
what's the cure to stress?
haha the bible says, why worry?
it's not as tho it can add a single hour to life.
LOL.
so just chill Mei Fen.
just make sure you use your time wisely
so you dont end up regretting.

okaaaay :)

HELLO :D

2011-07-30T16:49:00.001-07:00

It's always great to begin the day with YOU! :)

i'm so excited for what lies ahead today ^^

and you know why.. hehe.

thank you Jesus for your love to me

teach me to care for others

like YOU care for me :)

have an AWESOME Sunday buddies!

let not the cares of this world

take away your joy!

leave your burdens at the cross

and REJOICE for

THIS IS THE DAY THAT THE LORD HAS MADE!

Midsummer masquerade :)

2011-07-30T16:28:00.000-07:00

a few of the pictures i LIKE :D

my dear friend Christal :)

pwetty budak kampungs

my table :)

sue huey! my laughing buddy!

and ME :)

(most recent picture ^^)

we had a super awesome time in Midsummer Masquerade last Friday :D
MCKL ROCKS!!

sigh

2011-07-27T03:32:00.000-07:00

pulling away is not easy man
you need so much.. energy
and determination..
and courage..
i took the first step.
i will take the next :)
i have to.

God, strengthen me i pray..

expecting more :(

2011-07-22T07:04:00.000-07:00

do you just tell a person you love
that you can't make it through somebody else??
doesn't it sound a lil insincere?
i think so.
do you just break a promise
to someone you love
and not apologize to him/her after that?
doesn't it sound a lil rude?
i think so.
i thought she meant more to you.
but apparently,
you actions proves me wrong.

PASS! :D

2011-07-18T05:10:00.000-07:00

I PASS MY DRIVING TEST!!!!

Praise God! seriously~

couldn't have done it without Him!

let's see.. i did my road test first

everything went well until i reach

one of the traffic lights on the way back.

it was green.

i go.

turning yellow.

i slow down.

JPJ officer say "pergi cepat.."

but i stopped ady.

pass the berhenti line sumore.

man! but i felt calm all the while.

the JPJ officer din say anything.

i reach back at the driving place safely :)

17/20!

then there was the bukit.

seeing many ppl fail freaked me out.

but the moment i got into the car.

i knew i could do it.

and I DID! :) AMAZING!

the parking and 3-pointer i did within 1 minute.

seriously. all glory be to God!

WOOTS!

falling for you?

2011-07-09T22:22:00.000-07:00

i don't know but
i think i may be
falling for you
dropping so quickly
maybe i should
keep this to myself
waiting till I
know you better
i am trying
not to tell you
but i want to
i'm scared of what you say
so im hiding what im feeling
but i'm tired holding this inside my head

i've been spending my whole time
just thinking bout you
i don't know what to do
i think i'm falling for you
i've been waiting all my life
and now i found ya
i don't know what to do
i think im falling for you!

ahhhhh......
HAHAHAHAHAHA.. :D

MUESLi :(

2011-07-06T16:34:00.000-07:00

i use to love eating oats in schoool!
today i tried a different brand cz i finished the other one.
Sunsol Fruity Muesli.
i'd rather it taste bland and be filled with oats
then fruits :\
50% fruits sumore. yuck.
i LOVE fruits ok.
but this are the preserver types.
i prefer it like.. in small pieces. not so large.
sumore so exp. man!
nvm. at least its my money. so not too bad :)
i din waste parents $$. haha.

yesterday i hang out with Joshua.
had a great time. selayang mall la. where else?
broke my diet rule of no fast food.
ate McD. awesome. the taste of the burger..
and fries.. and chili sause.
ahhhh... satisfies me throughly x)

today gota burn all those fats away.
JIA YO! :D

update! :D

2011-07-02T18:20:00.000-07:00

i just realise that my previous post are all emo-ish
and about this "YOU" that you guys are blur about.
haha. no i'm not gonna explain it now.
maybe some other time larh :)

anyway, back to life.
it's GOOD! college is FUN!
it's kinda like, i've come back to college
after the holidays refreshed and ready to work hard!
and YES! i WILL work hard.
and i know God will be reward me faithfully
as He always had :)

when i first took up my Prayer Coordinator post,
i did it hesistantly.
i felt pressured.
i felt lazy. xD
i din't wana commit my time and effort
cause i know that is what awaits me..
but then again,
after the holidays,
somehow, maybe God has given me a new spirit,
i began to get excited to see what more AWESOME things
God can do and will do in MCKL thru prayer! :D
i can come for prayer willingly and eagerly..
it's AWESOME :)

haha. if you think something happen during the hols..
nothing. in fact, it wasn't exactly a very good holiday.
i started off badly, spiritually i mean.
but somehow, God turned it around i guess.
now i'm as good as new again!

YOU

2011-06-29T04:27:00.000-07:00

what is it that is in you
that has a hold on me?
what is it that you have
that makes me feel this way?
izit just your mere sweeet words
or your personality? don't know.

give me discernment God that i might make the right choice in life :)

life with you..

2011-06-28T07:24:00.002-07:00

cannot be pictured.
the more i think about it,
the more pessimistic i become.
as i ponder,
logic seems to sink in.
if i know so clearly you don't qualify *chewah..*,
why bother considering?

:(

2011-06-25T10:36:00.000-07:00

i was looking forward to seeing you!
but you just avoided me :( nvm.
you said you had alot on your mind.

i was looking forward to knwing what was on your mind!
but you said later :( fine.
i'll know when i call.

i was looking forward to talking to you!
but you just switch off your hp :( come on!
it's my birthday!
and you said you wouldnt chicken out!
argh.

dilemma

2011-06-22T05:13:00.000-07:00

so many questions, so many voices.
to give in or to not give up?
to hold to my principles or compromise?
to love myself or let others love me?
HAHA. what la me

stuck

2011-06-21T20:17:00.000-07:00

i don't know how to get out from here
or how to move on from where i am,
or how to overcome the obstacles ahead of me.
i keep falling deeper into it.
i'm confuse. often wondering if its right or wrong.
i don't know if its okay.
oh dear.. help me God :(

California King Bed

2011-06-21T20:01:00.001-07:00

chest to chest
nose to nose
palm to palm
we were always just that close
wrist to wrist
toe to toe
lips that felt just like an inside of a rose
so, how come when i reach out my finger
it feels more than distance betweeen us

in this California king bed
we're ten thousand miles apart
i've been California wishin on these stars
for your heart for me
My California King

eye to eye
cheek to cheek
side by side
you were sleeping next to me
arm in arm
dawn to dawn
with the curtains drawn
and a little last night on these sheets
so, how come when i reach out my fingers
it seems more like distance between us

just when i felt like giving up on us
you turned around and gave me one last touch
that made everything feel better
and even my eyes got wetter
so confused wanna ask you if you love me
but i don't wana seem so weak
maybe i've been California dreaming

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

this song caught my attention on the radio :)

how insulting!

2011-06-19T22:44:00.000-07:00

i think all Chinese aunties are the same. seriously. all they say when they see young ppl is, "wah.. you put on weight ady" or the opposite. All they see is the outer appearances. All they know is how to compare and contrast. All they do is comment. But most of the time the ppl commenting are fat too! my goodness.

I HATE it when ppl compare me with my family members. HATE is a strong word. but i'm using it anyway. cause its not as tho i do not work on losing weight or allow myself to over indulge. here I am, working so hard, and there you ppl are, pushing girls like me over the edge with your indirect you're-fat-already comment. I don't like it! i din't ask to be fat okay. can't you be more encouraging?

i'm sorry but i just need some space to chill.

Awesomest Daddy Ever

2011-06-18T23:05:00.001-07:00

to my dear DAD,

for all those times you stood by me
for all the truth you made me see
for all the joy you brought to my life
for all the wrong that you made right
for every dream you made come true
for all thr love i found in you
i'll be forever thankful Daddy

you're the one who held me up
never let me fall
you're the one who saw me through
through it all

you were my strength when i was weak
you were my voice when i couldnt speak
you were my eyes when i couldnt see
you saw the best there was in me
lifted me up when i couldnt reach
you gave me faith cause you believed
i'm everything I am
because you loved me :)

you gave my wings and made me fly
you touch my hands i could touch the sky
i lost my faith, you gave it back to me
you said no star is out of reach
you stood by me and i stood tall
i had your love, i had it all
i'm grateful for each day you gave me

maybe i dont know that much
but i know this much is true
i was blessed because
i was loved by you

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

thank you daddy for loving me
though you may be a man of few words
just being there and listening is sufficient
i'm grateful to have such a cool dad like you.
you've raised the expectation i have of a husband and a dad.
hope to have one like you :)
thank you Daddy. I LOVE YOU

friends forever

2011-06-17T22:31:00.000-07:00

things have changed.
everyone has moved on.
just so you know,
you will still remain in my heart.
the memories and fun we once had
may not be revived
but will be alive in my heart
as long as I live :)

wedding~

2011-06-17T22:17:00.000-07:00

i've been to sooo many weddings this year.
wow. way cool eh? cause wedding means
i get to look hot, meet hot guys, and eat hot stuff xD
k. just kiddin :D

well, after attending so many weddings, i realise that choosing to be with the right person is really important. like VERY. and today, i reflect on how i have thought i knew certain people, but was proved wrong. man. thats scary wei. then i begin to wonder how i'm gonna know if i'm dating the right guy. haha. it's one complicated but interesting task.

i guess that's where God comes in right?
He's there to help us make the right choice.
He knows who is best for us after all.
i can't wait for the day my daddy will walk me down the aisle :)

BURGERzzzz

2011-06-17T08:53:00.000-07:00

i know i'm on diet and stuff..
but when ppl treat you, its not nice to say no right?
especially after they have paid in advance!
so yea. today went out with my church members. had lotza fun!
ate SUPER HUGE BURGERS :D
enjoyed myself very much.
thank God that I am part of this family.
love you guys ALOT!
xoxo

LIKE

2011-06-16T22:57:00.000-07:00

can you please LIKE me?? HAHA

DRIVING :D

2011-06-16T22:52:00.000-07:00

was AWESOME.
really! i can't believe i can do it!
i always thought i couldnt. LOL.
but i could! in fact, i think it was pretty ez.
just the 3 pointer turning was a lil tough.
i couldnt do one of it. the turning, and clutch control and stuff..
but overall, it was okay.

i did 4 hours of driving today. not really tiring la.
suppose to be doing accouts hwk now.
feeeeeeling very lz xD
and thr instructor was okizay.
thank God for a good instructor. im not sure if he is good..
but i guess so. cz i turn out to be an ok-driver :)

phew. 4 hours down. another 4 hours next week.
ga yaou!!!!

date with miss Euuuuu! :D

2011-06-15T02:46:00.000-07:00

i had a superbly amazing time with Eu Jun Yin yesterday! man.. we laughed alot eh? i was so sleepy when i came out to meet her. but she freshened me up! we walked around alot. brought her to see some shops and clothes in Parkson. went to Sinma and tried out nearly every nail polish on my fingers. GOSH! Eu Jun Yin!!!! she did it on me! zOMGoodness. we laughed so much, the sales person loooked kinda angry. like as tho we were just fooling around. we ended up buying okay! haiyoooo..

we also went to D.I.Y. Jun said she felt cheated. stuff are so much cheaper there! Jun was so facinated she wanted to see so many things there. i think i got a lil bored cz i've been dere like so many times ady. it wasnt very fun being there cz i cant laugh properly. everything was so funny! im just weird la k. my mind thinks its funny, so i laugh. i cant help it. and jun just laughs along. which makes me wana laugh louder. thats my laughing system. xD

and then there was the visit to sushi king. one plate after another x) [reminds me of you btw. when you gonna ask me out again!? :(] we talked alot there. drank alot too! all in all, we had so much fun. i think we finally understand why God brought us both together. it's very important to have a Best Friend. for me, it is la.

Eu Jun Yin.. thanks for being my Best Friend.
i found out the reason ady x)

we're together to..
lift each other up after a big huge fall physically, mentally, spiritually :)
listen to one anothers secrets
give each other constant hugsssss :D
give honest criticism to build us up
laugh over each others lameness xD
be a tower we both can fall back on
and most of all, to keep each other sane in a hectic, crazy day!
i love you Jun!

back together again :)

2011-06-15T02:43:00.000-07:00

i'm sorry for leaving when i know i shouldnt have.
i'm sorry for sinning when i know it hurts you.
i'm sorry for ignoring you even when you call.
it's time to be back together again.
let start all over again please? :)
i can't live without you God.

first time

2011-06-13T02:35:00.000-07:00

wow. i've always awaited this day.
the day someone, anyone, would say what you said.

the STORM

2011-06-08T19:21:00.000-07:00

hot tears run down my cheek
as i question your actions.
my anger rises.
your words stab me again and again
at the core of my heart.
the pain leaves me hurting, bleeding inside,
wounded, fragmented..
i cry to ease the pain.
i cry to drown your voice in my head.
i cry to release the anger within me.

i know you love me.
i know that so very well.
but maybe, just maybe..
you're not teaching me the right way.
encouragement is important.
and if not that, at least, acknowledgement of one's effort.
i would have been motivated to do better.

as the storm calms down
disappointment and reality sets in.
i've failed again. great.
when will this never ending cycle ever stop?
i hate it. so do you. i know.
just bear with my mood swings
and don't mention it for now plz?
you don't know what it's like..
so don't assume. you'd just hurt me more.
i don't wana cry my eyeballs out. thx :)

guilty pleasure

2011-06-06T17:46:00.000-07:00

is there such a thing?
enjoying pleasure entwined with guilt..
but being too ignorant to drop the case
just because of guilt.
the pleasure cant be given up
on a basis of guilt.
surely there's more to it right?
think Mei Fen..
STOP and THINK

argh!

2011-06-06T03:35:00.000-07:00

this is the worst record so far.
i only did like what.. 4 rounds? ARGH
this is so annoying! i was so ready to burn fats!
but apparently my body wasn't.
haih. disappointed with my performance today.
first time im upset over my exercise.
hate it! :(

GET. MET. OUTTA. HERE.

2011-06-06T02:10:00.000-07:00

i'm stuck. again. great.
why does every hols end up this way?
cause i never change.
i never did change did I?
it was becuase i was too busy during school days..
i would never really know if im up to it.
if i've really changed..
or izit just empty promises to you.

and why did i promise him i'd conduct the meeting this Friday?
what's wrong with me?
gosh! now i'm so dead.
totally.

H.E.L.P.

just. keep. running.

2011-06-03T03:18:00.000-07:00

nothing's gonna stop me.
i'll run.
and keep running.

i ran alone today. as usual.
this malay guy who was playing football.
noticed me and started jogging too =.="
after maybe 3 rounds? he stoped.
ran pass him.
he said.. "kuat lari eh?"
and i ignored.
after another round.
i ran home.
sometimes its freaky.
but nothing will stop me from running.
just do it. NIKE :)

the pain, my pleasure :)

2011-06-03T03:15:00.000-07:00

every time my muscle aches
every second my heart is strained
every sweat that rolls down my face
every minute that passes with pain
is every hour that fills me with joy :)

the pain, my pleasure

interesting~

2011-06-02T01:42:00.001-07:00

i remember your smile clearly
your curious eyes as you see a different side
of the quiet girl you met at chapel
turns out she laughs alot eh?
:) LOL!

THE meeting

2011-06-02T01:36:00.000-07:00

WOW.
what i first thought was intimidating
turned out pretty.. AWESOME! :)
long time since i felt the way i did.
its different attending a CF committee meeting.
at the end of the day,
it always leaves you more refreshed and excited
than when you first came.

i remember this feeling very well
from being CF committee in high school :D
its not the same as other clubs.
the fellowship is just different.
thank you Jesus!

envy? beauty?

2011-06-01T02:45:00.000-07:00

there wouldn't be envy if everybody was happy with themself.
i think i learnt that from Wide Sargasso Sea, by Jean Rhys.
a novel i studied for English Literature :)
which i find really true.
what an epiphany! :D
enlightentment! whee~
Eureka! hahahahaha..

which is really true actually.
if i am happy with myself, i wouldn't envy.
i wouldn't envy your beauty or your slimness.
i wouldn't envy your attractiveness.
i wouldn't envy your looks or shape.
but i do.
that's the point.
that's my struggle.
ppl just notice you!
does beauty really matter that much?

dread~

2011-06-01T02:32:00.000-07:00

the feeling of dreadfulness overwhelmes me as i think of tomorrow. i don't want to go for the meeting. i dread it. i feel intimidated among them. i don't feel comfortable with them. i feel like quiting. i don't like the pressure i'm feeling. what a familiar feeling...

i remember feeling the same when i first went for my bm tuition. i felt pressured cause my teacher kept telling how well my bro did and how hardworking he was. i felt the pressure. and i hated it. because of that, i was so determined to prove to my teacher i could do the same. i studied hard, worked hard, and did great! :D i guess it's the same now...

i know i can't just quit everytime i'm faced with pressures. it doesnt solve the problem. it doesn't make anything better. only losers give in so fast. izit? LOL. i choose not to give in. i believe with the challenges i have ahead of me, with it comes God's grace to pull through. He will help me through it all. if He placed me here, He will be faithful till the end and not forsake me. so no worries Mei Fen.. chill :)

phew. it's really scary. but talking it over with God somehow draws me closer to Him. reminds me He is my best friend. He understands. He will supply the grace i need to get through it all. so thank you God for your assurance. continue to help me soar on wings like eagles Lord. and not be dreadful, but joyful in all circumstances! ;D

cutie-pie

2011-05-27T05:30:00.001-07:00

can't believe i'm saying this
but yeah.. you're really cute.
sad though. cause i seem to be invinsible to you! :(
oh well~~

i'm OVER you :P

2011-05-26T05:23:00.000-07:00

yeah man! its HOLIDAYS! woots!!!
no more books for the next few weeks! MUAHAHAHAHA..
kay. im just really happy :)
the number of things i wana do..
man. gets me SO excited! whee~

now this are some msges for a few ppl~

1. waiting for you to ajak me out for SUSHI
2. upset cz i was too blunt? haih.
3. im so gonna miss you miss Lina :(
4. awesome time with you guys. definitely gota sing K next time

tomorrow!

2011-05-25T01:25:00.000-07:00

last day of exam and woots!
im off for my hols! yeah yeah yeah! :D
so happy.. x)
wait. it aint over yet.
still gota study.. :(
left maths C2. jia yo! :D

FOOD :)

2011-05-23T22:33:00.000-07:00

sis prayed for me ytd to lose weight..
she said..
"God.. help Jie Jie to lose weight
and help help her to control herself
in Jesus name.. AMEN!" =.="
but its true la anw xD

yesterday went to FRIM do my jogging
woots! love jogging man :D wheee~
came home, super hungry.
after eat dinner, watch movie, ZZZzzzzz..
while sleeping..

i dreamt i went to this restaurant..
and i ATE, and ATE, and ATE
seriously!! oh my goodness.
i ate till i was so full man!
all my exerise had like.. gone to waste :(

thank God its JUST a dream :)
tho i guess i must be really hungry to dream of food
and eating excessively.
i think i should starve myself more, then go sleep
then dream of eating, and when i wake up,
i'd have phobia eating. =.="
lame.. x)

hang in there

2011-05-23T22:29:00.000-07:00

hold on to that tower of light
don't give in
don't give up
don't let go
cling on to Him okay? :)

if you look clearly
you will see that light
the light at the end of the tunnel
choose the narrow road
don't swerve to the left or to the right
fix your eyes on Him
keep moving ahead
He will come to your rescue
and meet you where you are

another day, another dawn :)

2011-05-19T16:53:00.000-07:00

it's Friday.
leaving the past behind,
i shall move forward! :)
thank God the excitement is eventually fading.
woohoo! finally back to norm.
wheeee~
exam on Monday :(
cant wait till hols!

your existance

2011-05-18T19:26:00.000-07:00

causes me to think of the unthinkable
do the unforgetable
and live out the impossible.

as much as im happy over your existance
it brings about much pain and sorrow too.
it's complicated.

maybe i should just pretend you never existed

BTS! x)

2011-05-18T19:14:00.000-07:00

Maths paper was really scary.
my heart was beating SUPER fast all da way man.
why? cause i wana get 100%!
its simple stuff la. the reason why i can't get 100%
is cause i keep making stupid, silly mistakes.
like putting - instead of +.
because of that, i'd lose 2-3 marks ady.
anw, thank God for being with me yesterday.
manage to finish the paper,
recheck,
solve the unsolvable,
and leave the hall with my heart
STILL BEATING RAPIDLY.
hmm. maybe it wasnt the exams only that
contributed to my nervousness/over-excitement..

anyway,
met up with Huay Shen in BTS! x)
i was super hungry when i arrived xD
went and makan at Subway.
by then, my heart beat slowed down ady.
we got talking.
first time hear Huay Shen talk so much.
which is good cause i get to practice listening xD
we just talked the whole time la.
from 4pm to 6.30pm.
then i had to ciao cause it was getting late.
laughed ALOT.
man. good way to destress after
stressing up for Maths =)

and hey!!!
i'm so gonna lose weight sumore man!
Huay Shen has been my latest INSPIRATION!
muahahahahahaha.
she lose 10kg lea. gosh. ENVY HER!
now i'm so gonna work harder :P
woots!

overall, had an awesome day =)
exams doesnt feel like exams.
maybe cause its still the first sem.
but i do feel pressured being in the cf committee.
afraid i cant live up to their standard. haih.
GOd please help me! :D

so there goes the latest update!
have a great day! byes!

In-COMPLETE!! :D

2011-05-16T07:03:00.000-07:00

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
based on the capital letters,
you know what i'm trying to emphasise on =)
jeeez.
i'm feeling... GREAT!
*for no reason?
or because i'm gonna be meeting YOU? XD*

anyway, i did indirectly complete my paper.
seeee => in-COMPLETE!
its just that i left out one question
and did not have time to elaborate on my answers
in the MSQs.
this time i attempted the essay question
(business studies exam btw)
and then only MCQs.
i followed the time ACCURATELY.
(1 hour 15 min)
and ta-da! this time i did not let any marks go to waste!
except the 6 marks for structure
cause no time. *lame =.="*

still, above all,
THANK GOD! :D
He truly helped alot! woohoo!
i see H.O.P.E!
getting over business paper is SO COOL.
its like.. EXAMS OVER! haha.
whens its not.

k. time to ciao.
i'l see you around.
next paper this Wed! Maths C1.
then my date with YOU! whee~

P.s.: don't salah faham. its just a girl friend! x)

fever's BACK

2011-05-13T11:17:00.000-07:00

two more days before Business Studies Paper!
gosh! so fast! I KNOW RIGHT!
and it's already 2.15am.
i wasted the whole night.. "refresh-ing"
instead of feeling refreshed, i got annoyed. =.="
HAHAHAHA.
anw, time to get back to studies.
can't run anywhere anymore.
i got matriculation too. in Perlis.
but i don't think i'm taking that up.
God made it pretty clear already =)

have a great day today!
God bless!

God's PLAN!

2011-05-13T11:10:00.000-07:00

i wanted a way out.
i saw IT as a way out.
i would have chosen THAT way out.
it seemed like THE best route.
but that was IF i was given THAT choice.

i knew you placed me in this position for a reason.
as i carry out my duties,
i knew it is my calling.
it's what you meant for me to do.
it is no coincidence.

but the pressure and the stress of studies
and the position.. causes me to lose myself.
think of a way out.
and saw THAT as an opportunity! :D *grins*

BUT *turning point*
you saw it fit for me to remain where I am.
and i know, cause i've prayed,
that you'd do what's BEST for ME! =)
cause you KNOW what's BEST for ME!
and I KNOW i can TRUST you with my FUTURE!

so yeah man!
its okay if i don't get JPA.
life doesn't stop here.
God will provide for my needs and help me

to do well in my studies!! =) thank you Jesus!

fever :(

2011-05-10T04:02:00.001-07:00

i think my fever is kinda high.
so limited time to study.
so worried for business studies and Eng Lit.
i really wana improve.
and i'm working on it. really HARD.
but..
but..
i dono if i'm improving :(

Lord, please help me!

p.s.: exam fever la k.
i'm a healthy girl. had not had fever for AGES xD

MUMS' DAY :)

2011-05-08T00:38:00.000-07:00

Happy Mommies' Day!! =)
its AWESOME to have a mum like YOU
I look up to the way you have raised us up,
to the way you have held yourself,
to the way you lead your life.
I wonder how you do it sometimes.
there's so many things to be learnt from you!
i wana be a mommy like you next time too..
i hope i can.
i bet you'd be the BESTEST and AWESOMEST Grandma EVA!
love you mummy.
am i ever so proud to have a mum like you.
YOIUNG
BEAUTIFUL
GRACEFUL
COOL
MUM like YOU..
xoxo
*hugs*

:(

2011-05-08T00:32:00.000-07:00

Discouraged.
Is that all you see?
Is that all you know of to say?
Is that THAT important?
I doubt you get me.
Cause you've NEVER been in my place.
Cause you DON'T understand how it feels.
My choices are always wrong huh..
and the life you want me to live..
is NO life at all!
I am within the boudaries!
what's wrong with enjoying life
after a hard day's work?

i'm sorry.
i'm just tired of your comments.
give me a break.

Stay The Same

2011-05-06T04:00:00.000-07:00

Don't you ever wish you were somebody else,
You were meant to be the way you are exactly.
Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are.
When you learn to love yourself,
You're better off by far
And i hope you always stay the same,
cuz there's nothing bout you i would change

I think that you could be whatever you wanted to be
If you could realise all the dreams you have inside
Dont be afraid, if you've got something to say
just open up your heart and let it show you the way

believe in yourself
reach down inside
the love you find will set you free
believe in yourself, you will come alive
have faith in what you do
you'll make it through

Mocking Bird

2011-05-04T21:38:00.000-07:00

yeah
i know sometimes things may not always make sense to you right now
but hey, what daddy always tell you?
straighten up little soldier
stiffen up that upper lip
what are you crying about?
you got me

Hailie i know you miss your mum and i know you miss your dad
well i'm gone but im trying to give you the life that i never had
i can see you're sad, even when you smile, even when you laugh
i can see it in your eyes, deep inside you wanna cry
cause you're scared, i ain't there?
daddy's with you in your prayers
no more crying, wipe them tears
daddy's here, no more nightmares
we gon' pull through it, we gon' do it
Laney uncle's crazy, ain't he?
yeah, but he loves you girl and you better know it
we're all we got in this world
when it spins, when it swirls
when it whirls, when it twirls
two little beautiful girls
lookin' puzzled, in a daze
i know it's confusing you
daddy's always on the move, mamma's always on the news
i try to keep you sheltered from it but somehow it seems
the harder i try to do that, the more it backfires on me
all the things growing up his daddy that he had to see
daddy don't want you to see but you see just as much as he did
we did not plan it to be this way, your mother and me
but things have gone so bad between us
i don't see us ever being together ever again
like we use to be when we was teenagers
but then of course everything always happens for a reason
i guess it was never meant to be
but it's just something we have no control over and that's what destiny is
but no more worries, rest your head and go to sleep
maybe one day we'll wake up, and this will all just be a dream

now hush lil baby don't you cry
everything's gonna be alright
stiffen that upper lip up lil lady, i told ya
daddy's here to hold ya through the night
i know mommy's not here right now and we don't know why
we feel how we feel inside
it may seem a little crazy, pretty baby
but i promise mommy's gonna be alright

..............................................................................................................

and the song goes on..
i find it so sad that this is the story of many people
out there who come from broken families..
it's not nice having to see our parents
go different directions.
i can NEVER imagine the pain their kids go thru..

J-E-S-U-S! :D

2011-05-04T07:31:00.001-07:00

thank God for Jesus.
phew..
what would i have accomplished without you?
who would i have been?
to what extend would i have gone wrong?
can't imagine.
i feel really blessed to be in a Christian family.
thank you so much God :)

post! :)

2011-05-04T07:25:00.000-07:00

long time since i've been updating my bloggie!
my blog is being very retarded and lame.
me no likey it anymore.
i rather write in my diary then.
HAHA.

anyway, Edexcel exams are coming really soon!
not very nice but its exciting!
though stressful but oh well..
it part and parcel of life right.
i got so stressed up i dreamt of exams
right after exam briefing the day before.
waliao.
PARANOID.

my challenge is to write essays within 45 minutes.
not easy when you have so much to write about.
done 1. i've gotta do another essay to practice.
my plan for today.
3 more essays to go. 1 down. WOOTS! =.="
and do Maths homework.

excited for my Sem Break!
its gonna be AWESOMEEEEEE! :D
wooooohooo!!!!
till then, have fun with your lives guys!
take care. love you.
xoxo

unrequited love

2011-04-24T02:41:00.001-07:00

YEOUCH!
hurts really badly eh?
when you remember him/her so clearly
holding on to them so dearly
in your heart and mind.
yet, who are you in that person's eyes?
just the girl/guy next door?
another friend whom they'd never notice?
if it's a yes,
it definitely is unrequited love.
not love - puppy love.
xD

Me First Lesson! :)

2011-04-24T02:29:00.000-07:00

KPP!
went for my first lecture for "L" today :)
the first step to being a driver someday x)
it was okizay.
not very nice cause
IT'S EASTER!
i wanted to be in church,
with my friends,
singing, listening to God's Word,
and fellowshipping together during the LOVE feast!
but i had no other day to attend this lecture
so no choice. T.T

i started of the day moody.
partly cause i was stressed up.
with the Edexcel coming,
me songleading next week AGAIN,
and this driving thing..
i just wanted a B-R-E-A-K!
the lecturer was funny.
the lecture was not boring.
i find it really cool :)
not too bad wad.
why do i hear negative comments from others?
don't know. xD

anw, thank God for Easter.
and now, im WAY HUNGRY.
going out MAKAN.
and that makes me HAPPY!
gna love the food. MUAHAHAHAHAH..
forget bout the stress Mei Fen!!
God bless! :)

words

2011-04-16T23:17:00.000-07:00

can sting real bad at times. am i too proud to receive such comments till it hurt this bad?

or is this just the normal response

of every human?

to hide and crawl away

when someone tells you your faults.

to just close your eyes

and wish you heard nothing.

to ignore the pain and

pretend everything's fine.

but the pain revives

everytime you look at the phone.

reminding you of the contents

in those inbox messages

the pain will always be there

until I accept it izit?

well, these are the ups and downs of life.

we're called to owez be teachable.

to be humble no matter how high your position maybe.

no matter how experienced you are in a field.

the Bible teaches us to remain humble.

continue to teach me oh God..

second chance

2011-04-16T23:03:00.000-07:00

Dear God..

give me a second chance to prove myself please?

i know i've gota work on it,

and I will.

I will give my best

to take care of my prossessions.

pwetty please? thank you!

arggggh!

2011-04-15T04:36:00.000-07:00

it hurts even more

when it comes from a Christian.

geddit?

allow me to explain myself (:

this dear friend of mine got into my nerves today.

i voiced my opinion on a certain topic

and just because my girl friend thought otherwise,

he said, "HAHA. even your friends trash you man!"

i'm like.. what?!!! =.="

i'm open to criticism okay.

that was not called trashing!

grrrrr...

then, after class ends,

i approach teacher to talk about

an assignment we were called to do.

teacher told me where i did wrong,

and that my groups questionare was kinda irrelevant.

and the WHOLE time,

he just kept laughing at me.

=.=" what's HIS problem?

i mean. yes, go ahead and laugh.

i'm the one that will benefit from my mistakes.

but it hurts okay.

keep saying, "owh Mei Fen, you got trashed again today" =.="

and said, "Joker la you"

when teacher told me my mistakes.

argh!

its so frustrating!

so annoying!

so hurtful! F.Y.I! :(

but Jesus say forgive. so fine lor.

i will do it. its just that..

it hurts even more

when it comes from a Christian.

geddit?

REUNION! :)

2011-04-15T04:24:00.001-07:00

i had an amazing time with my buddiesss!

Syaiesta and Suet Yan!

Betol and Hasina and Anis was there too!

i miss them. alot.

thinking bout it now.

their really those super cool buddies i have.

love them!

i ate super alot today.

feeling VERY guilty now.

and overweight! HAHAHAAHAHHA...

i better not list down all that i ate.

too depressing =(

tomorrow going back to school!

getting my awards and stuff.

praise God for everything! :D

its gonna be real cool meeting up

with old buddies again. hehehehe..

till then God bless! i gtg exercise and burn my fats!!

JPA interview!

2011-04-14T03:20:00.000-07:00

oh man. PRAISE GOD! :)
PRAISE GOD! :)
PRAISE GOD! :)
it just went really smoothly.
and no, i'm not over-confident.
i don't expect to get the scholarship,
but i'm confident that they will consider me.
hahahahahaha.
chances may not be high cause
so many others applied as well.
but still, i think i gave an okay impression to them.
whether i'm accepted or not, its up to God.
let His will be done.
cause his choice is always THE best for ME! =)

anyway, allow me to tell you how it went.. *clears throat* I was like, not nervous at all from morning till the interview. i was as cool as a cucumber because of Jesus! He gave me such peace that passes all understanding (: thank you Jesus! and my interview was suppose to be at 2.55pm. but because i went early, they pushed my turn forward, and i had to join the 2.05pm batch. WOW. that came as a total surprise. only 4 of us (: yet, i was okay with it. not bad~

my group consist of one malay, and 3 chinese *including me*. We started off with introduction. dalam bahasa kebangsaan. my voice quavered a lil but other than that it was cool. Praise God! :) we were suppose to talk about our background, school curiculur activities, and what we wana further in. and this are the list of questions they ask us..

1. sekiranya tidak dapat belajar di luar negara, adakah anda akan menerima tawaran belajar dalam negara? universiti yg mana merupakan pilihan anda?

2. sekiranya ya, berapa peratuskah yang anda inginkan tawaran itu?

3. Discussion quest: bagaimanakah anda jaga jati diri sebagai rakyat Malaysia di luar negara?
*this is when Mr Selva's tuition helps!* i don't know if i got it right but i said we can practice the festivals we have in Malaysia, during our national day, make sure we have the malaysian flag up, proudly call ourselves Malaysian if people ask who are we, and practice "rumah terbuka".

4. Discussion quest: how can we overcome the shortage of scientist and profesionals in Malaysia?
Praise God! i read bout this topic yesterday in the news bout what the government is doing regarding this. talked bout the 15% flat rates, sending their kids to international school and stuff.

5. Would you return to work in Malaysia if given a job offer there?

overall, the questions were pretty easy. my advice to you guys who have yet to go for the interview:

1. SMILE. BE CONFIDENT.
i believe it was my confidence that drew their attention *besides the undeniable fact that God's favor upon me played a BIG role in it..:)*

2. LISTEN to others. LOOK at them when they speak.

3. GIVE others the chance to speak. HELP them if they are stuck :)

4. *optional* SHAKE their hands when you go in and before coming out.
i don't know if that helps but its manners anyway.

5. RELAX! sound as natural as possible. SPEAK UP! as tho they are not there.

6. remember to wear formal yea. if not kena "tembak"

and the secret to a good interview: GOD.
pray hard. God is with you and He will help you! trust me :)
all da best for those who have yet to go for the interview!

Prayer Meeting for Sarawak! :)

2011-04-12T11:02:00.000-07:00

had a wonderful time with our bros and sista's

in Christ praying for our beloved nation: MALAYSIA! :)

yeah man. our nations ROCKS!

and God's gonna do awesome stuff in Malaysia..

trust me. and EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED! x)

met Roy there too.

actually its kinda like a Subang Prayer Rally thing.

we just went there to support my big Daddy.

as in dad la :)

and of course! to pray along with the others.

Praise God for a great time together.

i've pledged to pray for Sarawak this whole week.

join me in prayer and see how God will work in this nation!

C.J.!!

2011-04-12T04:04:00.000-07:00

Carle'ssssssss Juniooooor! :D

was AWESOME!

went out with Mun Li, Lina, Sue Huey and Sharanya.

first time.

AWESOME experience with AWESOME friends.

and the AWEMOSE burger.

with the AWESOME fries.

kay. i think i'm diluting the meaning of the word

"AWESOME". =.="

done with B.S. exam. now, for the interview..

pray with ME! byes!

SURPRISE! :)

2011-04-11T00:28:00.000-07:00

another surprise!

a NICE one :)

i got a gift from Dad.

i got a gift from Mum.

and now, a gift from God!

p.s: dear God,

could you please include the JPA scholarship

as part of the gift as well? xP

Stress~

2011-04-10T05:38:00.000-07:00

i could feel my imaginary tears welding up

in my shrinking heart

as i think about all I have to study

and the hours i have left.

I see the mountain grow bigger every second.

I see obstacles rise, one after another.

I see myself so incapable of handling it.

I used the wrong solution.

never did satisfied me.

then ONLY it dawned on me..

how could i be so stupid!

YOU!

and i did.

i called you.

and YOU made my day.

Awesome Buddy.

Awesome Friend.

Awesome Brother.

thanks for answering that call.. :)

FIXED!

2011-04-09T19:43:00.000-07:00

i manage to fix this whole setting thingy

that has kinda ruined my bloggie~

i thought i had to revert back to writing in my diary.

even planned to like dispose of my bloggie account.

but looks like it aint necessary! :D

i can just go edit my HTML and it'd be back to norm.

yippee!

i'm H.A.P.P.Y!

i know i am.

i'm sure i am.

i'm H.A.P.P.Y! :D

have a great day budddiesss!

the L-O-V-E cycle

2011-04-09T19:32:00.000-07:00

you like a person.

he/she doesn't like you.

you wait.

he/she seems disinterested.

you give up.

gets heartbroken.

*emo season*

then S.U.M.O

*Shut Up and Move On! xD*

I had to sleep it off to get off my emo mood.

not now!

not when i'm having exams!

but I needed the rest anyway.

so i slept and the next thing i know..

its 9am.

gosh.

wad happen to the 6am wake up plan?

screwed.

huggies~

2011-04-08T17:25:00.000-07:00

I love huggies!

I think I'm a kinestatic person.

It feels nice to get a hug when you're down you know.

well, at least I think so.

It sure does brighten my day :)

:P

2011-04-08T02:47:00.000-07:00

wads wrong with my blog?!

argggggh.

TRIALS :(

2011-04-07T04:19:00.000-07:00

BALANCE ME!

that's what the first question was about.

but I just couldn't solve it.

i was so CLOSE..

SO close to the answer.

but i just couldn't solve it.

DEPRECIATE ME!

that's what the second question was about.

but i kept doubting my answer.

i was so CLOSE..

SO close to the answer.

but i kept doubting my answer.

VALUATE ME!

that's what the third question was about.

but i got confused.

I goddit RIGHT this time..

GODDIT right man.

but i got confused.

PREPARE ME!

that's what the fourth question was about.

but i din't geddit.

i was so CLOSE..

SO close to the answer.

but i din't geddit.

DEFINE ME!

that's what the fifth question was about.

but i forgot.

i was so CLOSE..

SO close to the answer.

but i forgot.

so now you get how my accounts paper went?

yeah. i came out super depressed.

but thanks to my friends..

and the cendol..

i manage to get over it.

im back on track now.

ready to work hard for accounts! :D

Jadi Seperti-Mu

2011-03-25T05:18:00.000-07:00

Ubah hatiku, seputih hati-Mu

Setulus salib-Mu

Kasih-Mu, Tuhan

Biar mataku seperti mata-Mu

Pancarkan kasih-Mu

Ku mau jadi... seperti-Mu

love this song.. :)

dying passion

2011-03-25T05:09:00.000-07:00

where has that fire that use to be there
within the chambers of my heart for you?
where has that passion to please you gone?
has it extinguish in the midst of my busyness?
has it died off the day I gave in
and did not turn back?

the pain and emptiness can be felt,
really.
what should i do?
why do i try and try to return,
but something in my heart holds me back?
i know i have to deal with this.
i need to.

S.O.S. HELP T.T
i need you God

examzzzz

2011-03-25T05:01:00.000-07:00

is coming so fast.
way fast.
too fast! T.T

two weeks from now is trials.
few weeks from then is Edexcel Exams
for first sem ady.
owhhhhh..
gota start studying girl.. :)

i got my pressie ady!
Dad bought me a pair of sport shoes!
muahahahahaha. LOVE it man!
it's black and pink in colour.
running shoes.
way cool and nice!
praise God for that! hehe^^

tomorrow got treasure hunt.
really tired la. but still gota wake up at 6.30am.
for goodness sake, its SATURDAY! T.T
but i get to use my new shoes!
muahahahaha. so ok lor.
my partner is Mun Li! xD
gna enjoy ourselves tomorrow! wheeee..

till then.. byes! ;D

not IMPOSSIBLE :)

2011-03-23T01:20:00.000-07:00

what's my result?
MUAHAHAHAHAHA.
11As! prais God for my results!
AWESOME results!

all praise and glory be to God.
you won't know how much He has helped me.
seriously.
i wouldnt have made it without Him.
thank you dear Holy Spirit.
thanks for bringing me through.

thank you teachers and dear friends
for always bring there to support and encourage me
and help me destress.. hahahah.

love you guys.
and oh ya! to mum and dad too!
thanks for not pressuring me.
and for always remembering me in prayer. :)

and to my dear lil sis.
thanks for sacrificing your sleep
and allowing me to leave the light on to
burn midnight oil.
thank you so much Mei Yen. love you too.

and gor gor!
thanks for teaching me physics.
you rock wei. thank God for you.
love you too.

and the list goes on.
i just wana say..
work hard.
pray hard.
nothing is impossible.
LIVE YOUR DREAMS TODAY! :D

day before tomorrow

2011-03-22T08:46:00.001-07:00

SPM results coming out tomorrow.
how do i feel?
eerm.. not nervous. at all. x)
it feels like any other day. just that
i don't have to go college! wheeee! :)
and i get to know the reward of my hardwork.
i know my hardwork will pay off.

hopefully.
and if its not as i expect,
its okay. :)
I've learned alot bout trusting God as I study.

so see you guys tomorrow!
dono what to wear. haha.

i remember singing this song in high school
from the movie, Billy Madison

back to school, back to school,
to prove my dad i'm not a fool,
oh.. back to school,
back to school,
back to schooool..

happy!

2011-03-21T03:04:00.000-07:00

my dear friend
miss Ong Sue Huey say my blog to emo liao.
so i'd post happier stuff la k.

:) cause in all things we ought to rejoice
and give thanks! woots! :)

i'm HAPPY i made it through the day.
i wana quickly be done with my homework,
exercise, and then go SLEEP!
i'm starting to LOVE sleep man.
its.... ahhh..
rejuvenating,
refreshing,
amazing,
to wake up to a beautiful/ugly morning
with enough rest.

so SLEEP well! :)

To ***

2011-03-20T00:22:00.000-07:00

don't you think you're being a lil too vocal?
I'm worried for you la.
what if ppl don't like it?
are you not putting yourself in
a very dangerous situation?
and haha..
now who's the fb freak here?
you talk way way more than us! x)
just expressing my concern

tc.
love you!

BBQ! :)

2011-03-20T00:20:00.000-07:00

hehehehe.
later going out BBQ at friends house.
gna be so cool.
i'm hungry.
wana eat rosted marshmallowwwwwsss..
MUAHAHAHAHA.
will upload the pics! :)

XYs!

2011-03-19T09:19:00.000-07:00

nope. it aint a chromosome.
its my youth groups name!
XY!
Xtreme Youth! woots!

went to Bukit Lagong today.
enjoyed the waterfall.
great time together although
most of them are like.. 16++..
had heart to heart talk.
more like Uncle Herman sharing most of the time la
but it was really really cool.
we talked bout lotza stuff.
din really play in the water.
so so so COLD! seriously.
but still, it was fun, fun, fun!
thank God for a great time.. :D

today's Saturday service was way cool too!
Sis Jeannette song lead.
i played bass, and i enjoyed it.
but i think to the audience it was more like
me standing like a statue.
bet they cant even hear my bass guitar.
but who bothers.
as long as God is please, i'm cool with it.
even learned some new tactics. :)

so overall, i had a wonderful day!
napped in the afternoon.
din study at all.
which isnt very good but i'll tebus besok la.
must wake up early and study.
evening gna go out again.
makan gathering at church members house.
WOOTS! xP

praise God my feet is healed!
my feet had this alergy sorta thing.
so painful when i stand, walk, or just practically
do anything.
lasted a few months.
but after being on medications,
putting cream, its FINALLY healing.
praise God for that too. phew.
now i can get back to aerobics.
MUAHAHAHAHAHA...

that's all for today.
i wonder if anybody's like READING my blog.
i hope you are.
altho i know it can be kinda boring.
hahahah..

goodnight everybody :)
TTYS!

p.s: SPM RESULT coming soon!
CAN'T WAIT! :)

memories

2011-03-18T04:21:00.000-07:00

memories.
there are good ones.
there are bad ones.
ones that you wish you would never forget.
ones that you wish you'd never remember.

i wish i would forget that incident.
before,
New amazing Christian songs got me excited!
i knew what i could do with it!
now,
it discourages me.
i remember the time i failed.
miserably.
and i wish,
i'd won't have to do it again.
i don't want to.

they don't mind,
i do.
they may not notice,
i did.
they say, "it's part and parcel of life"
i say, "it's unacceptable"

when will i get over this?
now i now how they feel..

food=fat?

2011-03-17T03:33:00.000-07:00

is eating food fattening?
absolutely NOT right?
it's NOT fattening cause..
it depends la on what you eat. haha.

i love eating.
yup. i do. alot.
but you keep making me think
i'll grow fat by eating.
i use to enjoy food
but it's like im brain-washed by you
that just eating NORMALLY is FATTENING!
haih.

its so disouraging to listen to your
responce at times.
my friends often wonder why im so paraniod
over eating and dieting and stuff..
i thought it was just me.
but thinking again,
i guess you must have been the one
that's been brain-washing me!

it's so sad, really.
feeling disappointed over such things.
i know how to control myself k!
why do you worry so much for?!
T.T

yeouch..

2011-03-16T01:52:00.000-07:00

this time i was well aware of my surroundings.
the air was still.
no friendly talk.
no distraction.
i was more sensitive to all that was going on
compared to the other day,
just awaiting for THE moment.

and when it came,
i could feel my pain receptor being pricked!
yeooouch!
the pain seeped through my body..
ran through my veins..
made me cringe.

but as soon as it started,
it was over.
as fast as my body had detected pain,
it soon died off.
as terrible as i felt before,
my mood soon became better.

the dread of visiting doctors!

sistas!

2011-03-16T01:34:00.000-07:00

My dear lil sis and I :)

check out this girlfriend of mine..
Nurlina and I.
ain't we just like twins?
I KNOW RIIIIIIIGHT! ^^

date with Zach

2011-03-15T05:52:00.000-07:00

I have had a tiring, exhausting, eventful day.
with all the sales I'm getting from selling cupcakes and jellies
for my moral group project, and
the running up and down cz i keep forgetting stuff
i left in the locker, and
the fact that i risk my life crossing the road TODAY.
thought i was gonna meet in an accident as i saw all the cars
and motorcycles coming towards me. scary wei~

still, i had an amazing day.
Thank you God!
and it didn't just end there.
Zach ajak me go makan sushi.
parents allowed so we went s.m. lu.

we talked, laughed, talked, laughed,
eat, laughed, talk, laughed, eat..
i guess we were like talking really LOUD
at Sushi King but yeah.. he la! ;P
then after that, had to come home.
got curfew time ma. 8.30pm.
t'was dark so he walked me home. sweet eh? :)
now i'm back home safely.
guess he's still stranded at sm
waiting for his bro to pick him up.

dats about it for today!
now for the best part of the day...
going to BED! zzzzzZZZZZZZZ...
goodnight buddies~

God is LOVE

2011-03-14T14:47:00.001-07:00

amazing God :)

when . . .

2011-03-14T07:24:00.000-07:00

my life is not going great

OR

I am not happy all the time

ALTHOUGH

i do what is right..

research indicates (according to Dr. Laura) that the greatness of life
doesn't make an individual happy, it is ATTITUDE. :)
check out this Nobel Prize-winning Indian poet Rabinranath Tagore
which i find pweety amusing..

I slept and dreamt that life was Joy.
I woke and saw that life was Duty.
I acted, and behold, Duty was Joy.

How Could You Do That?!

2011-03-14T07:13:00.000-07:00

chapter 3: I know it's right . . . But . . . (where's your courage?)

many time's people ask, "I don't know what's the best thing to do"
rarely will someone say. "I don't know what the right thing to do is"
knowing the "best" solution will more likely give your personal
opinion due consideration.
knowing the "right way" promises sacrifice and nobility.
ain't that telling?

i'm reading this really cool book
"How Could You Do That?!" by Dr. Laura Schlessinger
she talks bout ethical dilemmas we humans face everyday.
and she's really experience.
i like this book! :)
borrowed from ma skewl library.
cool eh? ^^

my pride.

2011-03-14T03:03:00.000-07:00

"MEI FEN!"

all chattering and whispering stops.

eyes turned from everywhere

to somewhere.

ME.

my laughter pulled the handbreaks.

*ignores eyes*

*smiles*

*shuts up and copy*

nope. its NOT nice being yelled at.

it's my second time.

and i BELIEVE i'm INNOCENT.

i know its wrong to giggle when teacher is teaching..

and i'm sorry for that.

but..

how come it seems like

she only likes to pick on me?

or maybe its just another "co-incident"

that im talking when she turned around. =.="

lesson learnt.

no talking during Maths class.

disappointed you din't "side" me.

was not affected by this incident

until you said what you said.

guess i am in the wrong.

it's okay. like i said.

lesson learnt.

i won't repeat it again.

too expensive a price to pay.

my pride.

dear diary~

2011-03-14T03:00:00.000-07:00

you look way cool!
its so nice to have a diary this nice.. :)
i can design it anyway i want
to motivate me to blog more. ^^
now there are like more choices,
especially in the different ways words can be chosen
to be written in. love it! woots!

L.O.V.E

2011-03-13T00:06:00.000-08:00

HAHA.
as i was doing my homework,
home alone,
i thought what will happen
if i grow up and live alone next time.
staying home alone,
i wont have anybody to talk about my day to!
and if there's good news,
i've GOT to share it with somebody right?
and with me keeping all of it to myself,
i'd erupt like a volcano man!

HAHA.
so that's why i'd be sure to get married some day!
i want to have somebody to share
my ups and downs with.
somebody to listen and be listened to.
somebody to love and be loved.
woots.

HAHA.
its just a random thought.
*smiles* tehe ^^

the "downs" of life

2011-03-12T23:55:00.000-08:00

i expected it.
saw it coming.
so i wasnt too disappointed with the result.
nevertheless,
i cant help but feel upset.
as the scene unfolds
and flashes in my mind,
it revives my disappointment.

but it's okay :)
i'm more than willing to learn
from my mistake.
i will change and keep improving.
cause nothing is impossible with God.
woots!

tiredness

2011-03-11T21:46:00.000-08:00

tiring week :(

result of accumulated nights of staying up late..

lesson i have learnt this week :)

too tired she could sleep standing
after eating.. HAHAHA

....................................................................................

its been an exhausting month i guess.

after staying up so late

and waking up way early.

when i could finally get some rest

by sleeping early,

i found out it did NOT help me in skul.

i felt even more tired.

cause i guess i finally put my body into sleeping mode.

and it needs to get all the sleep i have deprived it from.

how terrible i know!

will try to get more sleep next time

so i wont have double vision

when studying in class. :)

sorry

2011-03-05T21:08:00.000-08:00

help me to put my confidence in you.
to learn to hang on to you.
sorry for giving in again.
T.T